Party, Annoy, Argue, Opinion, Distraction, Sress

Ni buat dalam bahasa Melayu sbb ramai org susah nak faham bila aku cakap depan2 mcm ar aku fail pemahaman sekolah rendah tp mungkin sbb aku tak bertutur mengikut trend org lama2. I dunno nak pergi annual dinner lagi ker tak sbb sound mcm anual party! furthermore, almost all my BFF tak nak pergi, why? because tu dah mcm gathering... untuk pengetahuan korang walaupun tak tanya aku dah cari pakaian n macam2 tp bila dapat info yg last2 minit >>>> combine uh god, my interest gone... sem akhir dah ni, so aku dah tak berapa peduli dah pasal himpun ramai2 ni, sbb I only interest to meet my friends only. tp still tak bg kata putus cause tgk ar kalau BFF aku say "jom ar bg muka" maybe lerr. First sem i dun go fot anual dinner why? I have thing to do at home but i pay; second year, I went sbb bg muka kat kawan aku ni sbb asyik datang umah merayu2, but kawan aku kata yg keter putih tu masa dinner kita dianak tirikan jer,,,, btul ker? maybe aku dah hilang sensitivity. third year? haha whose know if i going or not. people I wanna have fun with my family (BIOD) tp kalau dah gather ngan kumpulan besar yg i only know 10% shj,,, i cant be myself. what the hell i care to other people that bising2 kata tak sporting lah or what ever cause I Have Right To Choose. that for the dinner...

Ni yg pasal teater, I not aktif member due to my other stuff yg aku lagi suka buat. so ada plak senior yg bising2 sbb tak involve, ko nak involve pergi ar involve... saya dah tawar hati. noktah. but am i still support teater? yes sbb ia menarik.

Uh I have enough with all of this, ada yg kata Akmal what do u have....... I tell U, I sincerely dun have what U have or what most people have. But i have what most people dun have. kalau semua org dalam dunia ni sama jer,,, baik mati! boring btul. tp kan ayat tu mmg mengguris maybe sbb kena kut, but takper I know what Im capable in.

Dua tahun aku asyik ikut jer apa org kata org buat. sekarang dah final, aku tak kisah dah. because the time after graduation I have another life to think about.

To my BioD family, no matter I love or I hate U with all my life but still u are my family, no matter how our past relations have been u still my family,,, because to the family we shall return to. (bende sama aku cakap kat Ayu).

Dan kepada yg cuba sakit kan hati aku, uh congratulation u are hell successful. and if u happy with it fine, if i do mistake to u i apologize,,, that all what can i offer.

Im in critical moment to plan my next life so people plz have some sensitivity that I not a doll!

Have a nice day

Down n Up like global warming n global cooling

Firstly, my plan for post-graduate study (MSc Programme) is likely to became true.....

The lecture say well Im more happy to supervise u if u can maintain your CGPA 3.++,,,,, so, I think I can, and then apply for master fellowship RM 1,300 a month wahaha,,,,

Anyway its not the money that I chase, but the knowledge,,, I not a book worm, more to computer worm (not virus ler) but at least I have a dream that shall be reality,,,,

What worrying me now is that,,, my treatment always contaminate but never mind cause I have discover the technical error and I shall get the result (FYP getting fast),,,, well as you know at most critical moment that we need to submit work struggle with borrowed life and time,, this would be the likely moment for problem to arrise... Oh GOD save me...

A new begining.... for my old self...

Just another me...

Dear people,,, today is my birthday, a sign that I have already 22. Well nothing planned to celebrate it. Why, I'm just busy or more sincerely I don't feel I have too. Me, myself comes from a family that not celebrate this day. I just know people celebrate it from movie n whatever.

But I never expect many people wish me happy birthday and that make my heart melt. A power of bound and information.

So, I just wanna say and express my deep gratitude for remembering me as well as being very sweet to me. Forgot all the gift, I don't need that. I just wish to be carved in your memory as a people that embrace his friends.

Let me share you something,,, as for the new year and my birthday; I want to obtain my old self. A far different people you know from today since I'm very ignorance hahahaa. Forgive me for all the mistake I have done so I can be what I used to be, a long time ago. Thank you.... dear friends.

I though I lost her

Losing a friend?

Well last night was a very chaotic day in my friendship history. I didn't mind to lost any of my friends because they are just merely a friend. But losing a best-friends? nop nop nop. That was unacceptable. I do know she was very fragile, not sensitive to others also others that not sensitive to her,,,

I hope she read this that Im very sorry for all the miss communication and also lack attention given to you coz I'm barely trying to care of all heart of you people there. And therefore I missed you,

People do talk about you how you became ignorance and hurting other in a way you didn't notice, but for me its normal because that was you a past 2 years I have known you, yes people do change but most characteristic still there.

I recognize you as my best friend and I hope thing like this won't happen again. I also a fragile being; I think more fragile than you, easily break. I have more friends than you but they are like thorn in my heart. I treasure you as my friend and stand for you if you not there. "We" accept you as our best friends but sometimes there and not me wandering why you treat someone that not sharing everything with you like information, plan, fun, and what so ever, more than you treat us, we are here; your best friends. We need some attention and appreciation from you. We dunno if you afford to loss us. But I sincerely not.

"Friends is people that you can find anywhere, but best friends might come just one in thousand, they always thinking and taking you with them, share something they wont share with others, because you are more worthy to be with"

Problem teaching Us and teaching others

Abstract Suit Me Better Than Formal

Lately many thing unfavorable happen to me... its hurts and burden me much,,, where sometimes friend became enemy and rival became more supportive to myself. I hate problems and sickness. Hearing other people problem also hurting me deeply. Well a world free from problem was never exist. I realize that day by day I have became the old me,, negative,,, negative person. A type that not easily going well and where everything got filtered in my head.

However, Im glade that there still people that still support me and advise me. Sometimes I can became very naive and clumsy,,, sorry to other,,, I really want to finish this degree student life as quick as possible and get going to the next level far away from past memory.

Life isn't fair as always Jenny said....

For me life isn't fair if we keep thinking about we desire and when other get it easily but we have to work hard for it.

My FYP,,, hmm the cell contaminated and now its still in unfavorable condition. I really hope it will get ok soon. very soon...

Am I jealous about others? yes I am. I jealous. I want what they have,,, physically or materially. But as time goes on all gone like it is easily wipe out. Time a good medicine for me...

I hope problems can teach me well to get going as I want to live with life. Lastly, I just want to be myself... not other person, as other have idol for their motivation,,, I'm not, because I just want to be me, just me.

A deep n yet beautiful

"The greatest weakness of most humans
is their hesitancy to tell others
how much they love them while they're alive."

Orlando A. Battista

"Bright stars never leave. They die, yes, but remnants of greatness trail behind them, scarring the dark universe with light."

Comment from 15Malaysia

I desire death

I full with my hatred right now, I realize that there are many insignificance being around me and I didn't like it. If you cant make yourself useful to me than get away from my sight!

I hate to hate but when I start to hate nothing stop me even your tear just an entertainment to me. This demonic act have long imbue in me all this time. Cursing cursing cursing... I not even remember how many times have I repeat it. I hate too many stuff and always keep in my heart without I realize its now poisoning me. hahahaha Do I care? You insect just should die and anyway whose care with your insignificant life to me you just a tool.

Even if I cant parish you, I still can make your life harder than death it self. Don't talk big with me because you don't know me, You just know a smiling stupid character that cheering for other and wish for their happy ever after... and yes I do mean 'Happy ever after'; Till death I shall carry this hatred with me! and my curse will through your blood and even for last descendant of you.

Beware dont play with demon.... you don't know whose you play with... I never forgive and if I did that a lie... I'm not a fool or your entertainment,,, well if you don't have anything related with this post than feel free to relax maybe its not your turn yet...